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Dear Annie: Elderly mother wants strangers to stop asking if she is her children’s grandparents

Dear Annie: Elderly mother wants strangers to stop asking if she is her children’s grandparents

Dear Annie, I am an elderly mother of three young children. My husband and I tried for many years to have children but were unsuccessful, but with the help of artificial insemination we now have three beautiful children.

Our oldest is 5 and I’m 55 now. I knew having children later in life would raise questions, but some people can be so hurtful. Strangers have asked, “What beautiful children – are you a mommy or a granny?”

What does it matter to her and how can I make her day better by answering this question?

In the diverse world we live in, it seems perfectly acceptable to have two mothers or two fathers. Why is it not acceptable to be an older mother? What would be an appropriate response to someone who asks about this? – Speechless

Dear Speechless, I am so sorry you have felt judged and unaccepted by people who clearly have no idea about the journey you have taken to start your family.

Next time, try a simple but confident, “I’m her mom, and I’m so grateful to be that.” This will answer her question and hopefully close the door for further comments.

As annoying and hurtful as the people who ask these questions can be, remember that their opinions are unimportant. All that matters is the health, happiness, and well-being of your family.

Send your questions to Annie Lane at [email protected].

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